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A New Earth
  
A collection of random thoughts by an egomaniac with an inferiority complex.
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Growing Older Oct 27, 2007 6:19 pm
4278 Views
Looking at who is on line just now there is just the most georgous guy,and he is eighteen.To be that young again would be a double edge sword.But it dawned on me that I am getting old,and just don't feel that way on the inside.I feel very young,and am in the best shape that I have ever been in,since I got home from Nam,and I get on here and get very little response.I am actually not complaining here,just am not certain if it is that I am getting old,or everyone else is a scaredy cat like me.I have been emailing people that I find has some things in common with me,and am trying to break the mold on past behaviors.I really think that the ego would have me beliving that I am not desireable,and am in fact old,however,I refuse to believe it completely.I mean I do look at myself in the mirror daily.Instead I am choosing to let the feeling inside direct me,and I am having a lot of fun.I see now that good looks with a bod attached is just one of the many fleeting moments that we experience here,and that they just keep getting better.So I guess that getting older depends on how you look at it.
3 Comments
The time befor a visit. Oct 21, 2007 2:05 pm
3843 Views
I am waiting for a new friend to arrive for our second meeting.The first one went very well,and included a bit of kissy face,and a small amount of feeling,through cloths.We had talked for a couple of weeks befor our first meeting,and feel this is why it went so well.Have discovered that we share similar likes on a lot of things,and as the conversations have continued it has also become clear that we have very similar likes when it comes to sex.I am looking forward to this visit,because I think he is a really nice guy,however,am interested in how each of us reacts if it should become more than just a casual visit.We are both not interested in the usual BS of trying to impress each other,and have been very open when we have discussed different subjects.I was not nervous at all when we first met,and am wondering how we will respond to each other,because I am not nervous at all,and usually am befor these sort of encounters.I guess that it is sort of because we have built a bond already by being open and up front with each other,and there have been no surprises so far,and doubt that there will.It should be a fun visit,and hopefull we will know each other a lot better after words.I feel that we have the makings of a really good friendship,and think that this visit will allow it to broaden in its scope.Will maybe give an update after words.
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Am I really looking for ? Oct 4, 2007 5:06 am
Mood: 18, 4087 Views
In pondering this question,I find that even though I said that a friend is what I am looking for,and feel this way because the one time hook-ups leave me feeling empty,and not nearly as exciting as they might be if I had had a chance to get to know the guy befor, and develope some repor,or discover some common ground,and perhaps make some kind of connection.That my imagineation begins to run away,and starts considering things that should be considered a bit later.Does this happen to anyone else?Is this just an egoic game that we fool,ourselves into believing we are looking for a real friend when actually we just want the touch of another man,or to touch another man?Or does the imagination skip by the necessary foot work to discover if this other person is someone that has the personality,thought process,desires,that we are looking for,or think we are,and assume that everyone that you talk to is the one,and proceeds to develope an encounter that is filled.Which then leads to thinking with the wrong head,and all standards we have set up are over looked or ignored,and we fall into the same old patern of the one timer.

Perhaps this happens because letting what ever happpens be in the now,we judge what is happening on the past or what may happen,and miss the now.Perhaps this isn't the exact guy that had been imagined,or the exact place that had been planned out,and by just accepting what is happening at the moment to be whatis suppose to be happening,and that each of us are there to provide and make the conection that is really to be made.Because we are judging everything that is happening against what we had pictured would happen we miss the excitement of what is happening,and this is why we come away saying he wasn't the one,and actually never giving ourselves the freedom to discover perhaps he was just what we needed,and we were just what he needed at that moment in time.WE end up missing who he really was,because of all of the judging going on.He is to old for me,he is not as thin as I like,he is too young,he has to much or not enough hair,and on and on,and never just look at it from the perspective that this is what is happening and I want to get to know this person more closely,what turns him on,and what does he like,and showing him what I like.It never has turned out like I expected it to,because I can't predict the future,and am not willing to accept what is,for what I expected.Perhaps I should just go into it with the intention of giving more and not be concerned what is in it for me.
1 comment
A Twenty Five Dollar Enema? Oct 3, 2007 2:25 pm
Mood: 15, 4198 Views
Having experienced my first coconoscopy this morning,I would have to highly recommend it along with having your hemroids banded also.What a lovely experience!I am extremely disappointed that it has been recommended that I wait for ten years to have another.I feel the preperation for it was the most fun,starting with taking the $25.99 enema,which consists of four pills that are not to be chewed,I suppose because they tast differently that the sherry coating?,and then waiting for a movement.After the movement you start drinking this solution,mixed while waiting for the a for mentioned movement,and that I chose the lemon flavor pack over the orange or cherry options,eight ounces at a time every ten minutes until it is gone.What a blast this was,and it tasted not nearly as putrid as one might imagine.This liquid is suppose to be acompanied with very loose movements,and they are suppose to last for up to two hours after drinking the solution.Surprise! I only experienced one,and was totally disapointed.I mean I can remember Mother's enemas causing such a thunderous,explosive movement,one that would always have the phone ringing off the hook from neighbors concerned that she had experienced a gas explosion in the house,and it never cost me a cent!Wow,how things have changed.Mom's remedy for everything was an enema,and it is a shame she didn't realize that in the future people would be charging money for them.Another advantage to Mom's is the fact that I never had to go without food or water for twenty four hours befor having it.I was pleased to be advised that releasing the gas after words was totally accepted and welcomed,and I gladly obliged there request,and am still enjoying that hours after being returned home.So I am hopeful that I have put together a marketing plan that will encourage all to call their Doc and schedule the proceedure.
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Most Recent Comments by Others
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Am I really looking for ?77IrishmanSep 28 2:19 pm
A Twenty Five Dollar Enema?kissme44Dec 13 7:54 pm
Growing OldergreenlaternNov 21 2:41 pm